• Dogma

    Dogma

    ★★½

    Drink every time Linda Fiorentino asks a question.  If you’re actually going to try this, the number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255.  Try and call BEFORE you attempt the game.

  • The Northman

    The Northman

    ★★★½

    I enjoyed the atmosphere and commitment in this, Terrence Malick’s Lion King Dune of the Sith.  It was engaging and expertly crafted and performed, though I’m not sure I’ll watch it twice.

  • Frankenhooker

    Frankenhooker

    ★★

    This is one of those occasions where I’m not sure why the other Letterboxd reviewers are being so kind.  What starts out really well up through the opening titles then becomes a badly paced slog that kills the humor, never quite bringing it back to life once things pick up in the third act.  

    The reason for this is because the first act makes up 2/3 of the movie, leaving the last half hour to rescue the entire thing,…

  • Moonfall

    Moonfall

    ★½

    Although we were gifted three more years of Covid as a result, the world finally validated our brave, heroic conspiracy theorists with help from this film.  Thanks, Roland!  You did that.


    Smart-assery aside… just go in expecting something ridiculous, and if you’re not driving, 5 grams of Sativa will take the edge off.  Otherwise, be happy for this cast of actors — especially Donald Sutherland who cameos — because they probably made pretty good bank that may help them say…

  • After

    After

    In my middle school health class, it was explained — more or less — that Toxic Shock Syndrome is a sudden, potentially fatal condition caused by the release of toxins from an overgrowth of bacteria called staph — often affecting menstruating women, especially those who use super-absorbent tampons. The body responds with a sharp drop in blood pressure that deprives organs of oxygen and can lead to death.  

    My only explanation for this movie is that most of these…

  • After We Collided

    After We Collided

    I can’t deny the cultural influence of this film.  I’ve moved on from “smashed” as an alternate euphemism for “f*cked” to the more hip and contemporary… “collided.”  Now I can be less stodgy while I’m “inter-coursing” every ten minutes to moody songs with extremely on-the-nose lyrics.

  • BloodRayne

    BloodRayne

    Landing your dream job is never a guarantee, but I’m relieved to see those lens filters get so much work after graduation.

  • After We Fell

    After We Fell

    Google Maps confirms the driving distance between Tacoma and Seattle, Washington is approximately 35 miles and takes just 35-40 minutes.  That’s the review.

  • Anti Corona Virus

    Anti Corona Virus

    This is one of many indie features where reviewing it objectively means punching down. Way down. To the point where it almost isn’t fair to anyone who gave their all for this production. So allow me the following…

    Anti Corona Virus — as an overall indie work — isn’t worth discussing the performances, the crafts, or any aspects at a critical level where you can really dig into it… because it hasn’t earned that level of discussion.  This is because…

  • Prophecy

    Prophecy

    ★½

    White Mansplaining Savior: The Movie

    Drink every time Talia Shire asks a question to elicit information for the audience.

    Filed within the “everyone is profoundly stupid” canon of cinema.  This film from the Frankenheimer back catalogue isn’t a CANDIDATE for… (wait for it!)… SECONDS!

    (crickets… groans… Letterboxd snobs scoffing loudly…)

  • Don't Look Up

    Don't Look Up

    ★★★½

    The subject matter begs urgency.  The film requires distance.  Meanwhile, if you pretend the undermining epilogue doesn’t exist, this satire becomes much more devastatingly effective.


    The more meaningful version of this satire would have ended at exactly 2:06:34, then rolled credits over black, no score.  They would have earned it.

  • West Side Story

    West Side Story

    ★★★½

    As most critics have rightfully pointed out, there is much to admire about Spielberg and Kushner's take on West Side Story, which offers a number of accomplishments that defy our initial expectations… which is why I’m going to be a little tougher here.  

    They've opened all the right doors when it comes to utilizing historical, societal, and cultural post-scripts as a means of truly grounding this musical in a real world where such things matter. If only they had…