Christian Ryan

Christian Ryan

Meesa heart will go on.

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  • The Music of Chance

    The Music of Chance

    ★★★★★

    There was a time, not so long ago, when humans used to search for meaning in things they didn’t understand, particularly where it wasn’t immediately apparent. They’d look for it in the music they listened to, the books they read, the films they watched. I’m not kidding!! You laugh, but at one time, it was actually a natural response to most external stimuli. I was there! I swear to god! This happened during my lifetime!

    We’d finish reading something like…

  • Wrong Turn

    Wrong Turn

    ★★★½

    After The Music of Chance (which I'm still trying to figure out how to write about), I felt a bit like that kid from The Far Side cartoon: "May I be excused? My brain is full." Well, Wrong Turn proved to be the perfect remedy for an overworked noodle; a film that bathes itself in the blood of absurdity, renouncing pestilent logic in homage to the lotus-eating gods of excess (in retrospect, a fitting contrast to The Music of Chance's

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  • The Wolf of Snow Hollow

    The Wolf of Snow Hollow

    ★★★★½

    When I was a kid, my dad represented a man accused of multiple murders, and when he was acquitted of the crimes, as a show of gratitude, he took our family out to dinner at Bonanza Steakhouse. As we all sat there eating, I kept staring over at the man, wondering if he was capable of such atrocious acts. At one point, he busted me, looked up from his plate and met my gaze. He set his silverware down and…

  • After Midnight

    After Midnight

    ★★★★½

    It’s hard to recommend this film to you, because, well... it wasn’t made for you. It was made for me. I don’t say that to discourage you from checking it out - it’s a remarkable picture - but as it wasn’t designed to cater to your specific tastes, I just don’t see you finding much of interest here.

    Let’s take a look:

    It was written and directed by two guys named Jeremy and Christian. My brother Jeremy and I (Christian)…