The Legend of Tarzan

The Legend of Tarzan ★★½

I didn't have high expectations going in, so I wasn't shocked that it wasn't good. On the contrary, it didn't suck AS much as I thought.

I'm not even going to start out what was good in the film, because the list is very few. I shall start with what was terrible. The acting. I seriously didn't realize Tarzan could be that boring. I'm sorry to say but Margot Robbie really sucked. She was extremely awkward and made me hate Jane (which btw I love in the Disney film). The only reason I saw this film was for Christoph Waltz, and he did the best with what he had. Sort of a shame to see such a great actor who plays villains brilliantly be in such a crap role. Samuel L. Jackson did have a few funny lines which really saved the film.

That damn script. It was very bland and the dialogue felt extremely forced and unnatural. The storyline was all over the place. The cinematography tried hard to be artistic and modern but failed miserably. But most of all...that CGI. I've never cared for lots of CGI, but this film spares no expense for loading the scenes with as much fake looking CGI as humanely possible.

Overall, pretty disappointing. Not many good qualities. Because I have no shame, I will say this: The movie was worth my price of admission not for Alexander's eight pack abs, but for the closeup of Christoph's booty. That is all.

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