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  • Fast & Furious 6

    Fast & Furious 6

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    Nope. Still not grown up enough to handle.... you know.

    Stupid arsed dumb action series making you invest emotionally in the characters and get genuinely upset when one or more of them carks it. How very dare it :(

    Also, Han and Rome getting their heads kicked in on the Underground and then agreeing never to talk about it will never not be funny. Nor the jokes about Rome's forehead. Pretty much everything about and involving Roman Pearce in this whole series, really.

    That runway was longer than the M1, fuck.

  • Fast Five

    Fast Five

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    A film packed with realisations.

    The realisation that The Rock is box office gold on top of being the greatest person alive.

    The realisation that Justin Lin had somehow become a good director.

    The realisation that this dopey petrolhead saga was perhaps about to become one of the greatest action film franchises of all time.

    The realisation that they should never have left Roman Pearce out of the previous two films.

    The realisation that you can arbitrarily add half an…

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  • Trainspotting

    Trainspotting

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    Choose Letterboxd. Choose films. Choose downloading the app. Choose paying money for a membership just so you don’t have to see some fucker adding 500 films to their watchlist. Choose following a few thousand people and then never reading a fucking word they say. Choose writing β€œRead the full review on my website!” knowing full well no cunt is ever going to follow that link. Choose asking Sally Jane Black to watch Rogue Nation and then seeing her do a…

  • Mad Max: Fury Road

    Mad Max: Fury Road

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    What makes a 5 star film?

    There are lots of different criteria floating around for what makes one. By their own admission, some people are a lot freer with dishing out such a grading whilst others insist a film practically has to become their all time favourite to receive full marks.

    It is, of course, completely dependent on the individual. I've often wondered if I am quite strict or quite liberal with the amount of times I've handed out full…