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  • The Post

    The Post

    ★★★★★

    98

    Among the barrage of bad wigs and the 'name that character actor' ensemble game is an unwavering exemplification of a master artist operating with a set of 40-year-old tools. From the CCR needle-drop, practically announcing its Vietnam depiction as public perception, The Post mythologizes the discovery of truth in the ongoing process of journalistic decay. This is Steven Spielberg's first Western: a last-stand along a dusty, war-torn road which has already lost its fight against capital and corruption. Akin…

  • Phantom Thread

    Phantom Thread

    ★★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    100

    My dearest Mama,

    Apologies for my inquiries being fruitless as of late. Many tasks have been on my mind since my illness and, against all odds, a simple night off from work put me five places behind. It's not that you aren't here. Your shadow clings to the walls, shimmies into every gown, lingers along the floorboards - I know you watch Cyril and I. The door opens frequently enough on its own to provide a larger dose of…

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  • Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

    Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

    ★★★★½

    87

    Setting: Marvel Board Meeting

    Kevin: "And then I said, we already put in 3 end-credits scenes, how about 2 more?!?"

    *eruptive laughter*

    Marvel Exec #2: "You're such a card, Kevin."

    Kevin: "These movies don't make themselves!"

    Marvel Exec #3: "Well I mean they kinda do. That's why we installed that conveyer belt in northern Idaho and everything."

    Kevin: "You got me there!"

    *Meeting Room door opens*

    Kevin: "Well look who it is, our crazy director intern, come in James."…

  • Warcraft

    Warcraft

    15/100

    Me: Hi, I'd like one ticket for Warcraft please.

    Ticket guy: Did you bring your strategy guide?

    Me: Wait, what?

    Ticket guy: Have you played The Burning Crusade and Wrath of The lich King?

    Me: Waitwaitwait...slow down.

    Ticket guy: What about Cataclysm, Mists of Pandaria, and Warlords of Draenor?

    Me: I don't even know what a Draenor is.

    Ticket guy: Are you excited for Legion?

    Me: Is that based on the demon movie with Dennis Quaid?

    *Ticket guy sighs, rips ticket, and points the way towards the auditorium*

    Ticket guy: Good luck.