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  • The Place Beyond the Pines

    The Place Beyond the Pines

    ★★½

    It has lofty goals of being a multi-generational epic about fathers and sons and how actions have consequences that ring out for years and whatnot but also the first third with Gosling robbing banks and being hot just runs circles around the rest of the movie to a hilarious degree, completely undercutting the latter two thirds's attempts at greater thematic resonance as a result

    Pretty cinematography tho

  • Bloodshot

    Bloodshot

    ★★★★

    (to the TMNT theme)

    BLOODSHOT starring Vinny Diesels
    BLOODSHOT starring Vinny Diesels
    BLOODSHOT starring Vinny Diesels
    BLOODSHOT starring Vinny Diesels

    (oh, also, it slaps)

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  • The Blue Planet

    The Blue Planet

    ★★★★½

    The ocean is pretty as fuck, guys.

  • Vice

    Vice

    ½

    An absolute trainwreck with the nuance of a brick to the dick, mistaking raw anger for insight and condescension for intelligence

    We all know that Dick Cheney is an abhorrent human being, and this movie acts like it's adding to the conversation surrounding his legacy when it's just a repeat of what people already know - one could make the argument that it's meant to be educational, but when the movie is basically screaming at you that you're an idiot for the entire runtime, it's not going to reach those who it's trying to teach, and as a result, just becomes a worthless waste of time