Guardians of the Galaxy

Guardians of the Galaxy ★★★★½

[Apologies once more to the estate of Stan Lee for these platitudinous parcels of prodigious puffery and piquant pluggery]

STAN'S SOAPBOX, VOL. 10  

Hey gang, I'm in deep trouble. I've got the Soapbox column to write and it's due at the printer tomorrow morning!  So here I sit, in front of an emotionless typewriter with fear and panic welling up within my noble breast, while the cruel clock keeps tick-tick-tickin-- HEY! Hold it! I thought of something! Wow! Talk about being saved by the proverbial bell!

Hey look, maybe Norse thunder-gods or goateed armor-plated wiseguys aren't your cup of tea -- but even the few heretics who remain at large are apt to be dazzled by our latest caravansary of cataclysmic characters!  Jester JAMES GUNN joins the Mighty Marvel braintrust to bring us the GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY, a way-out, spaced-out saga featuring the quirkiest band of misfits this side of DP 7!  

The slings and laserblasts of outrageous fortune bring together STAR-LORD (Jocular JACK BLACK*), GAMORA (Zestful ZOE SALDANA), DRAX THE DESTROYER (Darin' DAVE BAUTISTA), the gargantuan GROOT (Verbose VIN DIESEL), and ROCKET RACCOON (who checked into his room, only to find BRADLEY COOPER), who quickly run afoul of big Blue Meanie RONAN THE ACCUSER (Lethal LEE PACE) in his perfidious plot to eradicate the sufferin' Xandarians!  If that sounds frenetically frantic, it is!  But don't worry, gang, it's got moxie, it's got heart, and it's got the dulcet tones of Elvin Bishop, to boot!  Miss it? Perish forbid!

Until the HEROES FOR HIRE start accepting DOGECOIN, Make Mine Marvel!

Stan

THE MIGHTY MARVEL CHECKLIST (PHASE TWO)

☑  IRON MAN 3
THOR: THE DARK WORLD
☑  CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER
☑  GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY
☐  AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON
☐  ANT-MAN

*CORRECTION! Boy, is my face redder than MATT MURDOCK's tights!  Mercifully JIM "Trouble" SHOOTER caught my flub - the role of Peter Quill, aka STAR-LORD, is played by none other than Capable CHRIS PRATT - just wishful thinking on Ol' Stan's part, I guess!  (Just kiddin', Chris! You were a riot!)

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