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  • The Kissing Booth

    The Kissing Booth

    ½

    This movie feels like a parody but I don't think it's a parody in any way.

    Oh, the things I do for High School Slumber Party.

    Update: I only got 6 minutes in without distractions and 22 minutes in with distractions before I had to stop watching it. I'm not taking this review down.

    Those 22 minutes hurt.

  • Happy Death Day

    Happy Death Day

    ★★★★★

    Wait, their college mascot is a baby?! Bumping this up to five stars.

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  • Inconceivable

    Inconceivable

    ★★★★★

    Oh yes. This is that good stuff. That real good stuff.

    I genuinely don't know whether to give this movie 1 star or 5 stars, but since I took five pages of single-spaced notes in Word for #CageClub, I think 5 stars is more appropriate (one star for each page of notes, obviously). Along with The Book of Henry, this movie is by far the most fun/crazy bad movie I've seen in 2017 so far.

    This is, essentially, Gaslighting: The…

  • The Book of Henry

    The Book of Henry

    ½

    I want to give this movie 1/2 star and also 5 stars. Is that an option?

    If this movie isn't proof that extraterrestrial life exists (in the form of whoever came up with this idea and wrote this screenplay), I don't know what more we can hope for. 

    Almost defies description in its insanity. 

    I can't even.

    That said, I kind of love it in so far as I'll never, ever see another movie anything like this. Ever.