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  • Insidious

    Insidious

    ★★★½

    Have you ever watched a big budget film and just thought "damn, this would have been way scarier as an indie." Without the corny Blockbuster aspects of ~the importance of family~ and all that jazz, the film could have reached its true, fantastically macabre potential.

    I believe I've said this in every one of my prior reviews, but it garners being addressed yet again - the demon's getup is laughable. If it weren't for the jump-scares, he would just be a knock-off costume from the Broadway production of 'The Lion King' on a meth bender.

  • As Above, So Below

    As Above, So Below

    ★★½

    Through trial and error, scientists (me) can now confirm that -- although one *can* have sex with this playing in the background -- you probably should not.

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  • The Breakfast Club

    The Breakfast Club

    ★★★★

    for years upon years ive always wondered about old peoples fascination with this movie and that shaggy guy with a birdnose and baggy clothes pumping his fist in the air.
    i get it now.

  • Cannibal Holocaust

    Cannibal Holocaust

    ½

    "Hey, intentionally malicious and violent acts are being done on camera to shock audiences these days - let's make a movie to point out this exploitation!"

    *intentionally does malicious and violent acts that are being done to shock the audience for a movie about how that's supposed to be wrong*