Wait, what? You're saying this is one of the big masterpieces? One of those list-toppers? That it's been loved and hailed for 80 years? Wow, that's fascinating.
Then how come it's so fucking boring?
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Licorice Pizza 2021
As years go by, they keep wearing down and rebuilding their armor against each other, skipping around between various love interests, until they suddenly one day wake up to realize there was never any other love meant to be but the one between each other.
Like me and the My Little Pony cartoons.
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Turning Red 2022
Someone else said it best. Pixar is at its finest when they're doing talking bugs or talking toys or talking emotions. People just isnβt their thing.
I donβt think this was a bad movie, itβs cute and funny and all. But it never makes me feel fully invested either, and I donβt like the hectic pacing that it starts off with and never drops (the same thing I felt was problematic with Encanto).
So it leaves me with a lukewarm feeling. Not on my Pixar top-10.
And thatβs all I have to say.
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Top Gun 1986
Actually, I'm not sure I've ever seen this in its entirety before. And I almost didn't again, since I could barely keep my eyes open. I mean, this is not a bad film by definition. It's just so extremely fucking boring. 90% of it is just rolling jet planes and slo-mo beach volleyball. And all characters are unlikable, with Maverick being the biggest douche of them all (stop breaking the rules, of course no one likes you you jerk!).
But there's no doubt I'll watch the sequel anyway. π
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Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness 2022
On a trippyness scale from one to ten, this one is 14,000,605. Itβs an insane mix of super hero action, humor and Sam Raimiβs finest horror. And on top of that a bunch of cameos and twists that made me wanna scream out my loudest insanity scream (which of course I didnβt, only idiots scream in movie theaters).Β
Throwing in an extra half star for the musical fight. That was freaking beautiful, and any film with a regular boring fist fight will have half a star deducted to compensate, starting now.
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Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers 2022
Woah! WOAH! I was NOT expecting this!
What I expected: a regular Disney Television Animation studio sequel, with tired jokes and an obvious cash grab agenda.
What it was: one of the most hysterical crossover films ever, a self-aware and super-ironic live action/animation comedy bomb!Β
This film has so many golden moments, and itβs one of those films you wanna rewatch and go through frame by frame because you missed most of the references and cameos.
Like the inclusion ofβ¦
