Chappie ★½

Fair warning: I watched 25 minutes of this film. That's all I could take. Every other review I've written has been for the entirety of the film, but I decided to mark down just what made this film so bad.

Perhaps I'm just disillusioned by the whole "oh god the robots will take over" plot anyway, but Chappie manages to achieve a completely new level of stupid and cheesiness. The writing is atrocious as it is, but ultimately it was the delivery that forced me to stop watching this.

WHY IS THE ACTING SO TERRIBLE? Scene after scene I'm dumbfounded that Deon was cast at all, but furthermore confused why Ninja and Yo-Landi are in the film whatsoever. These people are musicians, not actors. They are absolutely terrible performers. It didn't help that the tech aspect is handled in the most elementary way. I cringed as I watched a scene of Deon holding his breath as "CONSCIOUSNESS.DAT" was created successfully. Just kill me.

You can see the ending in the first few minutes with the MOOSE guy rambling on about his inventions unsuccessfully selling to the police force. I read the ending after the fact and was right on the money.

What makes me sad is that I really, really loved District 9. It was a fantastic film that was imaginative and well-done. I was expecting more of the same, but instead I got Die Antwoord screaming "gangster robot". I have a funny feeling that recasting them would've helped the movie immensely.