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  • North Shore

    North Shore

    ★★

    Scrub it, kook!

    An impenetrable mush of surfer slang and island accents, and I say that as someone FROM Hawaii. Thankfully, I do speak movies. Pretty sure I'd be at home with a new-in-town/Karate Kid klone even if it were all in Simlish.

  • Don't Hang Up

    Don't Hang Up

    "Click me some likes and let's make this bitch go VIRAL" -Prankmonkey69

    I love when movies invent their own fake social media platforms because the names are uniformly terrible. Here are a few from this movie:

    -LibertyVee
    -UseTube
    -Frenz.com (relationship status "Under Discussion")
    -PopShot (for "dick pics")

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  • Immoral Tales

    Immoral Tales

    ★★★

    Not enough naked European chicks lol jk there are enough

  • The Survivalist

    The Survivalist

    ★★★★

    I thought it was a dumb name too, but there's a surprising amount of gardening in this movie! For every brutal, violent scene of post-apoc hoodiemen savagely killing each other there are about 50 that are just some dude survivaling - and at least one time jerking off on his plants. Why do I feel like I'm not selling this very well.