RSS feed for Matt
  • Aquaman



    Jesus turned water into wine, but did he ever turn wine into flying wine knives? No. No he did not.

    I rest my case.

    Full review at ScreenCrush.

  • Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle

    Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle


    Mowgli? More like No-gli, am I right? Thank you, I’ll be here all week, try the veal!

  • Shoplifters



    When you’re in a family, the easiest thing to steal...
    [David Caruso sunglasses emoticon] your heart.

  • A Simple Favor

    A Simple Favor


    How dare they not call this movie Diabolake? HOW DARE YOU PAUL FEIG!

  • If Beale Street Could Talk

    If Beale Street Could Talk

    I look forward to many years of hearing this movie’s magnificent score and then stopping whatever I’m doing to listen to it while taking several long, deep sighs.

  • Hale County This Morning, This Evening

    Hale County This Morning, This Evening


    I have no jokes to make about this one. It is just a beautifully shot, smartly edited portrait.

  • Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

    Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse


    The ultimate Spider-Man movie — in more ways than one.

    Full review at ScreenCrush.

  • Mary Queen of Scots

    Mary Queen of Scots


    Not terrible, but releasing this movie while The Favourite is still in theaters is a bit like trying to put out a new Airport sequel two weeks after Airplane!

  • Burning


    After all these years, I finally understand what Bono was talking about in that one song.

  • The Lego Batman Movie

    The Lego Batman Movie


    You haven’t seen Lego Batman until you’ve seen it the way its creators intended: Glanced at occasionally on a phone while trapped in a car for 6 hours between two children, including one who is wailing at the top of her lungs.

  • Sorry to Bother You

    Sorry to Bother You


    Well okay then, that movie wasn’t horsing around.

  • On the Basis of Sex

    On the Basis of Sex

    On the basis of sex bay bee
    Let’s talk about RBG
    Let’s talk about all the good laws 
    And the bad laws
    And equality
    On the basis uhhhhhhhf sex
    On the basis of sex