Favorite films

  • Midsommar
  • American Movie
  • Boogie Nights
  • Everything Everywhere All at Once

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  • Men

    ★★★½

  • (500) Days of Summer

    ★★★★★

  • We're All Going to the World's Fair

    ★★★★

  • Firestarter

    ★★★½

Recent reviews

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  • Men

    Men

    ★★★½

    Before I saw this, I saw a tweet calling Men pretentious and I felt my Cinema-Lover-Brain-Cock harden in defiance, but honestly I get why anyone could walk away from this thinking that. (I’ve always found an inner eye roll towards any* [*created by men] art associated with The All Holy [badum tss] Vagina, and there was enough of that to stir the feeling)

    I have to say it: I really really really wish they didn’t include the CGI Rory face on the…

  • (500) Days of Summer

    (500) Days of Summer

    ★★★★★

    I’ve watched this film so many times with different serious perspectives: Identifying as Tom, Identifying as Summer, analyzing Tom as a tragically toxic male simplistically pedestaling a woman as a manic pixie dream girl, I got dumped and needed a cry, I dumped someone and couldn’t explain why and needed a cry, I realized I liked The Smiths and needed a cry, every perspective except the one I think this film doesn’t get enough credit for: god it’s funny and…

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  • Beanie Mania

    Beanie Mania

    After searching earnestly for the Beanie Rap online, I made the unfortunate discovery that the lyrics don’t appear written in any corner of the internet. So I spent 30 minutes pausing and rewinding and squinting at the screen to transcribe this, you’re welcome, kill me,

    “It’s a Beanie Rap (I’m all Ty’d Up)” by Jeannine Marron Twardus

    Let me tell you a story about a guy named Ty.
    Seems he created these Beanies that make me high.
    Little beans in…

  • Bob Ross: Happy Accidents, Betrayal & Greed

    Bob Ross: Happy Accidents, Betrayal & Greed

    Bob Ross was hot and fucked, get over it