Melody has written 123 reviews for films rated ★★ .

  • History of the World: Part I

    History of the World: Part I


    Appreciated it a tiny bit more than last time, but still pretty damn awful on the Brooks scale, haven't seen Dead and Loving it or Life Sucks or Twelve Chairs yet but pretty sure this is at the bottom. 2 stars for Madeline Kahn anyway…

  • New Best Friend

    New Best Friend


    I hoped this would make the Dominique-a-thon worth it on some level by virtue of its being old, like The Smokers… I can't say it's any less blah than the DTV stuff she's done lately I just didn't connect at all. It's fun to find out why I avoided watching all her movies this long (looks at the camera). I'll give it this, it looks great. I think I was disappointed it didn't feel more of its time, maybe that…

  • The Wrong Teacher

    The Wrong Teacher


    Nuts, but fun and fine. Like I said, gonna have to be some reviews like this this year if I'm gonna do the Dominique Swain thing lol. I actually spotted her this time. She's basically the Drew Barrymore in Scream character except she's completely forgotten for the rest of the movie? Which leaves me wondering if that's why I felt like I didn't even watch the last couple of these maybe she had the same kinda role… still begs the question, why? What happened? It's worse than Mischa I tells ya!

  • No Time to Die

    No Time to Die


    …Last Temptation of Bond?

    (lol I just brainfarted that out on Twitter and I'd be astonished if I was the first but gonna be brave and not look/search and start with it anyway)

    I had to look back and remind myself when these writers stepped on board and I can't believe it was actually on my favourite one back in the Brosnan days because part of me felt like his era was the only one they sort of shunned in…

  • Zombie Killers: Elephant's Graveyard

    Zombie Killers: Elephant's Graveyard


    Halloween Mischathon

    Some fairly impressive effects here but it's pretty much why I quickly got tired of The Walking Dead. There's a lot going on that never really comes together. Mischa's hardly in it though her final scene is pretty noteworthy, she really will do aught (or used to, I guess). Felissa Rose as a religious nut is by far the best thing going here. But it is nice to have a full on horror movie in the Mischathon.

  • Cyberstalker



    Halloween Mischathon

    "I'd kill myself for you."
    "Please do!"

    lol this is more like it, and I'd've known better if I'd known it was a Lifetime movie (that poster actually looks good). I had a feeling some of these wouldn't really be horror (it was hard to discern without reading too much about them) and here we have an insulting thriller about technology and the art world that seems to know embarrassingly little about either (the onscreen graphics in this…

  • Malignant



    I came to this so blind I maybe expected it might have more to say (I happened upon someone quoting the, "It's time to cut out the cancer," line and combined with the title was like woah… that's all I knew about it…) but I was bewildered enough by the tonal balance here (kooky CSI girl, Joseph Gordon Levitt-alike, kooky-ish sister - I loved her the most btw) that it was at least a unique ride before it even got…

  • St. Trinian's

    St. Trinian's


    This is honestly, impressively, aggressive lol. In a way I admire it. I don't like it. It's not even worth it for Mischa. But dang, in a time capsule way etc… it's fascinating. It feels a lot older than it actually is.

    (I guess I liked it more last time…)

    19th April 2008:

    As with the original Star is Born and the political thrillers mentioned in my Vantage Point review, it's been too long since I last saw one of…

  • Grotesque



    Utterly baffling part-home invasion part April Fool's Day type "is it real?" line blurring, almost ridiculous and fascinating in an, "is this like made by an actual crazy person?" way enough to not be bad? Just so many weird choices in front of and behind the camera. The main gang leader is like part-Wheeler from Return to Oz part Bobcat Goldthwaite lol. Honestly barely even worth it for Linda Blair.

  • Look What's Happened to Rosemary's Baby

    Look What's Happened to Rosemary's Baby


    Would've probably watched this a lot sooner if I'd known Ruth Gordon was in it… and I'd've just been disappointed sooner. She'd still be the best thing in it if they gave her the chance but she's mostly on voice over duties with Ray Milland. It has a decent enough atmosphere thanks to Charles Bernstein's score and John A. Alonzo's photography (how the hell did they get him so fresh off Chinatown?!) I found it weird how they cast someone…

  • The Tamarind Seed

    The Tamarind Seed


    I was sitting all the way through the opening credits waiting for the Maurice Binder credit and there it was… it even has a song by Barry and Black (Barry does the score) - that’s sort of the best part of it, I never got interested enough to follow the story at all. You can draw such a weird line from the early Bond movies to this to Hitchcock’s Torn Curtain, so it’s Of Interest, I Guess.

  • The High and the Mighty

    The High and the Mighty


    “Now… we’ve lost our number one propellor… this is just one of those things that never happens… but does once in a billion flying miles…”

    Airport 1954… so, so long, but Dimitri Tiomkin’s score (especially the main theme which might be in my head all weekend) is nice and it’s interesting to see how far back this type of movie goes back (I’m fairly sure it didn’t come up when I watched all the disaster movies a few years back including Zero Hour, or maybe it did and I just wasn’t in the mood for John Wayne).