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  • Kung Fu Yoga

    Kung Fu Yoga

    ★½

    Probably the worst archeology-related film since The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor.

    Only the car chase is even watchable.

  • The Big Sick

    The Big Sick

    ★★★½

    This is such a nice movie I don't want to say anything bad about it for fear of hurting its feelings.

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  • Jupiter Ascending

    Jupiter Ascending

    ★★★★

    I don't know what to make of a world that rejects this and adores every Marvel movie. Things don't make sense to me.

  • The Theory of Everything

    The Theory of Everything

    ★½

    Undecided as to which is more offensive:

    1. The implication that Hawking's work can only be understood, or even be relevant to us, an audience of normal dumb people, in how it validates or invalidates our concept of God.

    2. The depiction of infidelity in which Jane's is fraught and melodramatic, to the point that mere knocking on another man's tent causes her husband to collapse into coma and never speak again (someone should do the math on this causality…