• The Incredible Hulk

    The Incredible Hulk

    ★★

    I forgot this was such a mess...as a stand alone film, or part of the MCU (other than the post credit scene). Adding to the outlier status it's on HBO and not Disney+. I'll acknowledge Liv Tyler for having to pretend to love Edward Norton though. Acting baby!

    But who cares. It's National Puppy Day and I'm honoring my pups by toggling between them for my profile pic. Which is way the hell cuter than any bullshit I could contribute about a movie.

  • Pitch Black

    Pitch Black

    ★★★

    In 2001 I saw Ghosts of Mars and had the sad realization John Carpenter’s reign was over and he wasn’t coming back. That was a tough pill to swallow.

    I should have washed that pill down with the similarly themed Pitch Black, which was released the year prior and was likely available on the fancy Digital Video Disc. But I had never heard of it, David Twohy or Vin Diesel. No doubt I was still clinging to older action heroes…

  • Amsterdam

    Amsterdam

    ★★★½

    I've been out and about. Reduced to old Star Wars on the iPad while packed into airplanes and airports. I give AirPods Max a thumbs up while traveling BTW.

    Where were we?

    Oh yeah, Fascists and dictators are bad.

    What we’ve learned recently is that the Joseph Goebbels branch of the Republican party was well aware that Trump was a dangerous fraud and imbecile. “Hated him passionately….presidency was a disaster…a failed business man”. That’s not Rachel Maddow, that is straight…

  • Mystic River

    Mystic River

    ★★★★½

    In terms of pure directorial skill I’ve gotta put Mystic River up there with Eastwood’s best. Not as game changing as Unforgiven, or as re-watchable as Josey Wales, but Clint just directs the hell out this (while also snagging a Composer credit!).

    Despite the fact I’ve enjoyed Dennis Lehane’s novels I tend to think of them as Grisham-y pulp. Largely serving as a preamble to an inevitable film adaption down the road. But throw that b-movie material at Fincher or…

  • eXistenZ

    eXistenZ

    ★★★

    Willem Dafoe groveling at the feet of JJL then bitch-slapping Jude Law was the highlight. It’s kooky shit like that where Cronenberg shines. Jeff Goldblum twitching and mumbling gibberish….Christopher Walken shuffling around with his cane stalking everyones head space. When DC focuses on these quirky characters and macabre sense of humor I’m on board.

    But there are times where his body horror punchlines seem silly. Are all the rubbery moist fleshy things representing an evolution of science and technology? Obviously…

  • Coherence

    Coherence

    ★★★★★

    Midlife dinner gatherings are awkward. Coherence taps into this truth before the opening credits roll. Size matters. 3 to 5 friends hanging out has a casual intimacy about it and involves your core group. Over a dozen becomes a party and the dynamic flips….volume provides cover. But around 8 is unnatural….you can’t relax or hide…it’s several hours of performing. Everyone talking a little louder, trying to be witty and snarky, petty rivalries forming in real time.

    Push everyone into their…

  • Tales from the Darkside: The Movie

    Tales from the Darkside: The Movie

    ★★★

    It was driving me nuts trying to recall where I'd seen William Hickey before...then it hit me it was as Uncle Lewis showing up to the Griswald's with a cat. A cat that gets vaporized by Christmas lights.

    A cat that returns a year later to obliterate William Hickey and his toupee in Tales from the Darkside. Justice for felines.

    From the late 80's to mid 90's Christian Slater was on a hell of a run. He's doing his thing…

  • Crimes of the Future

    Crimes of the Future

    I should’ve trusted my instincts the first time I tried watching this and tapped out after 10 minutes.  I was a lot smarter back then.   A month ago.

    I don’t believe any of this reflects some truth about the human condition.   Physical, spiritual, or evolutionary.    It all looks and feels inauthentic and unintentionally silly. 

    The only positive I have is the cinematographer does a fantastic job shooting night scenes.  Shame they weren’t available for the Hellraiser reboot.

    Viggo looks f’ing ridiculous in his Ninja suit.

  • Skinamarink

    Skinamarink

    As a moving picture book deconstructing and abstracting my childhood home this was a macabre curiosity. In 1975 it could’ve been me and my sisters house growing up. I even had wood paneling in my room. Legos and cartoons filling the space.

    I found myself wondering about the lens being used to shoot this, and digital filters they ran the footage though. For camera nerds it turns out they shot this at over 100,000 ISO (on semi-wide angle primes) so…

  • Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness

    Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness

    ★★★

    If not for the “Spot the Raimi-isms” I think this would’ve been a dud for me. It looked and sounded amazing, but isn’t that to be expected from Marvel at this point.

    If time has no constraints, and the universe no meaningful boundaries, then what in hell do you hang your story on? Disney is losing billions so I have to imagine they’ve already whispered in Downey’s ear not to hang up his iron suit yet. I’m sure he’s doing…

  • Avengers: Infinity War

    Avengers: Infinity War

    ★★★★★

    Late in 2022 global population hit 8 billion people. Resources are dwindling, climate catastrophes escalating, and tribalism has us divided into waring factions on a non-stop basis.

    Thanos was a Hero and Marvel Universe should’ve ended at Infinity War.

    Looks amazing on D+ with all the IMAX and Dolby goodies.

    A great weekend to everyone!

  • Season of the Witch

    Season of the Witch

    ★★½

    I noted in the Super Bowl recently that Buddy Christ took out advertising. Was that satire? As AOC pointed out, “I don’t think Jesus would spend millions of dollars on a Super Bowl Ad to make fascism look benign”.

    Season of the Witch ups the ante and makes theological fascism look heroic. Even celebrated by those they would have burned alive, which is weird as hell. I understand its a dumb Nic Cage + Ron Perlman affair, and shouldn’t be…