Okay, I'm not gonna lie, I'm kinda drunk and more than slightly high, but I have so many questions about this movie.
Why does the CGI look like a BBC2 educational cartoon thing from like 2001?
Why the fuck does the kid basically marry a crystal heart?
Why does Lava Girl keep forgetting she can, y'know, fly?
Most importantly though...
Why have I only just got round to swing this glorious travesty of a movie?