Favorite films

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  • AVP: Alien vs. Predator

    ★★

  • Adaptation.

    ★★★★

  • Heel

    ★★★★★

  • Ricochet

    ★★★½

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  • AVP: Alien vs. Predator

    AVP: Alien vs. Predator

    ★★

    Not good at all. And it takes way too long to get really cooking with how dumb it is, but once it does it’s at least a stupidly fun ride. I’m probably gassing it a half star for how much I like Sanaa Lathan, in general. 

    I think my biggest actual gripes with a movie about Alien vs Predator would be the CG was very bad and there were many moments this movie was begging for some practical effects. And, relatedly, this movie was scary approximately zero times.

    A pretty sterile movie overall.

  • Heel

    Heel

    ★★★★★

    Made David Bixenspan SO mad.

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  • Ricochet

    Ricochet

    ★★★½

    The richest man’s version of a JCVD movie. 

    Denzel is a bundle of charisma and there are a few points where you can really see him working out what’s going to become Alonzo in Training Day. 

    Lithgow is a really good, maybe all time tier villain. Not here. In general. But he’s really fun here and brings a needed physicality to the proceedings. 

    The plot is fucking wild. To be blunt. And there’s some real nutty scenes. But I can’t say I had a bad time in the slightest. Tony Scott shoulda done it.

  • Texas Chainsaw Massacre

    Texas Chainsaw Massacre

    Garbage attempt at a sequel to the original. Overly gory in place of actual scares and tension. 

    Trash movie I give one extra half star to because the canceled scene was as stupid and awful as I wanted it to be.