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  • The Villainess

    The Villainess

    ★★★

    Nikita for the GoPro ultra violence generation. The script felt like it was written by 2 people in separate rooms over the course of one night then glued together with whatever blue Powerade they had left. Spoiler alert. Absolutely everyone dies...except for...nah actually they died too. When in doubt pile the corpses high. Nice.

  • Body of Lies

    Body of Lies

    ★½

    Someone dipped DiCaprio’s chin in honey and dunked his head in a pile of pubic hair. Mark Strong (the best thing about this uninspired scramble) and Russell Crowe get hairpieces made out of broom heads. I’m lead to believe that there is tension by the sheer amount of squinting and looks thrown around over the top of glasses, however the story is close to non existent and super generic at best. The same can be said of the soundtrack which…

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  • Uncut Gems

    Uncut Gems

    ★★★★½

    Have you ever missed a flight? It’s stressful af. This is worse. I do not recommend this film. I have no fucking nails left. It’s brilliant. Waterboy come good.

  • Manhunter

    Manhunter

    ★★★½

    Michael Mann directed serial killer caper featuring unlikely bow legged hero William Peterson better known from CSI. A retired FBI profiler tries to farm sea turtles accompanied by a highly enjoyable score, classic Mann tension, shitloads of shattering glass and a truly unsettling Lurch-like stalker creep.