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  • Solo: A Star Wars Story

    Solo: A Star Wars Story

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    ******* had the right idea when she blew herself up 30 minutes into this

  • Mission: Impossible II

    Mission: Impossible II

    i NEVER open my reviews with a quote but.... "THIS IS NOT MISSION DIFFICULT MISTER HUNT IT'S MISSION IMPOSSIBLE." and i had completely forgotten sir anthony hopkins was in this! since hes not even credited what a king of subtlety.
    -the hair
    -thandie newton's character in this has the same name as me and it was REALLY weird to hear tom and anthony keep saying my name
    -between the last time i saw this and now i watched a john…

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  • Alien: Covenant

    Alien: Covenant

    ★★½

    those gay robots really stood there and discussed Romantic poetry while the humans died off one by one. coincidentally that is my exact definition of a perfect future

  • Baby Driver

    Baby Driver

    ★½

    every time someone got shot I found myself wishing it had been me instead...

    I can see how people would like this. It's vivid. i found it very repetitive and hollow with nothing to hold my interest aside from Jon Hamms face. the artificiality is clearly intentional but without any legitimate emotion to connect to... it's just crashing cars and unfunny jokes.