Tais Nøhr has written 35 reviews for films rated ★★½ .

  • Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness

    Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness

    ★★½

    This is a silly movie that wants to do way too many things. The introduction of America Chavez is rushed and after the credits, I'm still not sure what she is capable of or who she is. I don't feel the connection between her and Strange either.

    I am also of the unpopular opinion that Raimi is a pretty bad director. He had the perfect humor for the Evil Dead series because those were really b-films that need that little…

  • Murder on the Orient Express

    Murder on the Orient Express

    ★★½

    Kind of a snoozefest. I'm not sure if the story works as a movie at all to be honest as it's certainly not the actors being the problem (dench, ridley and dafoe are all sublime as always).
    The mystery might be great in book form but it wasn't enough to keep me entertained for the duration of this film. There were certainly also plenty other problems with it, one of the biggest being Michelle Pfeiffers overacting, but my boredom was the biggest one.

  • Bring It On

    Bring It On

    Oof this is problematic in so many ways today (it probably was back then as well). Seriously a guy takes pride in slipping his thumb up a female cheerleaders skirt during practice... Still weirdly charming for what it is.

  • Constantine

    Constantine

    Some things in this one works really well, others not so much. In the end my real gripe with it is that it's kinda boring as most of the 'fights' end up just being John Constantin telling us what he just did and not us actually seeing the cool parts.

  • Pacific Rim

    Pacific Rim

    ★★½

    This is what it's like to be inside the head of a seven year old I'm pretty sure.
    It's a traincrash and it can be hard to look away.

  • Spider-Man

    Spider-Man

    This is really only good through nostalgia-tinted-glasses. I like Parker as a proper introverted nerd and Willem Dafoe is amazing. The actual film is horrible though. Sam Raimi is not a good director. Nobody acts natural and every spoken line is so bad and forced. The CGI is horrible, even for 2002 and a lot of the acting is just the worst. People need to stop praising this.

  • Godzilla vs. Kong

    Godzilla vs. Kong

    ★★½

    Everythinh in this happens so unorganically. It feels like an awesome B-movie without any of the charm that makes those entertaining.
    The characters never act realisticly and everything is told, not shown. "It's the axe, it is drawing radiation from the core like it is charging"... How would you know that? Well, because you need to because otherwise the audience would know absolutely nothing about this super convoluted plot.

    Portals? Podcast hosts with tinfoil hats? Journey to the center of…

  • Squid Game

    Squid Game

    ★★½

    This is way overrated. It could've easily shaved a couple of episodes by shaving off the entire horible "behind the scenes" plots. Whis is the policeman and the Front Man plot even in this? they aren't used for anything.
    The last episode is horrible. The games themselves are a fairly entertaining criticism of capitalism that has been done to death before (Battle Royale, Hunger Games, Running Man to name a few). It is still fun enough when they are actually playing and the show should've been more about that.

  • The Lost World: Jurassic Park

    The Lost World: Jurassic Park

    The idea of moving away from Grant who already has a finished arc and onto the next grumpy white dude in Ian Malcolm is a fine idea.
    The film also starts out alright. The reason why Malcolm "must" go back into dinosaur territorry is not even as dumb as it could be.
    The beginning doesn't have the pacing of Spielbergs original movie but it is fine. The real tragedy comes with the entry of our parental t-rexes. Those things comes,…

  • Outland

    Outland

    ★★½

    I think I had too high hopes for this after hearing multiple of my favorite podcasts talk it up. The effects have aged beautifully and honestly hold up much better than I'd have thought. Connery is charming as always. The main narrative is really cool.
    The actual movie feels way longer than 144 minutes though. For that short a film I was bored for way too long. Also the score is super weird and way too jolly for a murder/drug thriller.

  • Top Gun

    Top Gun

    ★★½

    While it certainly has that classic-feel about it, it is also surprisingly boring when you don't have any nostalgia-tinted glasses. Cruise is charming but his character has that 80's rapey wibe going that doesn't really hold up today. I don't know who thought a plot about some guy graduating school would be entertaining but at least they had Tom Cruise, Val Kilmer and a great god damn soundtrack to make it worthwhile to watch

  • Universal Soldier

    Universal Soldier

    ★★½

    I feel like this film didn't utilize the fact that it starred JCVD. He is mainly just a dull sleepy robot that doesn't really do anything cool except for two great fight scenes. To think what an actor with funny bone like Arnold could've done with the role...

    A person who was 100% utilized is Dolph Lundgren and boy is he amazing. He seems to have tons of fun as the psycotic veteran with an ear necklace. He also has a thousand cool oneliners and a bunch of fun scenes. In general this film is much more his than Van Dams and he gives it everything.