Army of the Dead

Army of the Dead ★★★

“It’s a goddamn zombie tiger, that’s crossing the line!”

My relationship with Zack Snyder is... complicated.

Being that I adore his Dawn of the Dead remake, I was immeasurably excited to see this. Much to my disappointment, it was not my cup of tea. It felt more like Snyder’s hissy-fit do-over of Suicide Squad (2016) except it makes the same mistakes without any of the things I enjoyed so much about DOTD (I mean, come on, it even had a evil zombie Cara Delevingne look-alike!).

Snyder’s characters have consistently weak exigence and transparent dialogue, and something about that just really annoys me. I usually am fine with idiot plot as long as it’s self-aware and doesn’t take itself too seriously, but Zack Snyder always thinks he’s doing something revolutionary and it shows. I think the whole sentient zombie thing in this movie could have been tossed, it doesn’t add anything other than minuites to the long run time. I admire his creative ambition, but I need more than zombie tiger to make up for such unsubtle dialogue and messy storyline. Some people can tolerate this (objectively poor, sorry) kind of storytelling in exchange for action—but I am not one of them. I swear, I really tried to ignore it and just enjoy this long-awaited cinematic delicacy, but I failed.

However, these downfalls aren’t completely without avail. The opening credits sequence was, and I wholeheartedly mean this, GOLD; hilarious, visually pleasing, exquisitely bloody. The R-rated gore and special effects within the movie were not tasteful whatsoever and I absolutely dig that. Although there were plenty of jokes that were murdered by horrible comedic timing (may they rest in peace), there were a few rewarding moments that were just immaculately funny. Also, though not intentionally comedic, the addition of Zombie by The Cranberries as the emotional end music had me DEAD 💀.

All in all, Snyder’s character arches and narrative style aren’t my personal favorite, but I will give it an additional .5 star than I think it deserves because I feel bad for being so harsh lol.

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