Godzilla: King of the Monsters ★★★★½

HOLY SHIT

2014 was a natural disaster drama, but it wasn't a Godzilla movie.
This is a Godzilla movie.

HOLY SHIT

In the last two weeks I've seen a good handful of classic Godzilla flicks and I've come to love the series deeply. This movie is legitimately so close to being one of the best Godzilla movies of all time, in my opinion so far. Holy shit.

The monsters all feel like sentient creatures with motivations, and I loved the fear and awe I felt every single time they looked straight into the camera, especially Rodan. The CGI was spectacular, I don't think I've ever seen such beautiful, authentic, richly textured CGI monsters. And those fights!! Oh my God! This was truly so well done.

I love how much personality they gave Godzilla. It's still not where it should be, but it's miles better than in 2014. I also like how much focus they give his eyes this time. They're still physically too small, but given the design established in the first movie, Dougherty really made a good effort to help Godzilla emote.

The score was excellent with the classic themes but the sound effects were so loud that I couldn't get the full impact of the score as often as I needed it. I was so happy when they reprised the classic themes for Godzilla and Mothra during the end credits.

Also, they fixed Godzilla's roar! In 2014 he sounded like a Jurassic Park T-Rex but now he's fucking Godzilla! It's so good!

Since Kong 2017 was tons of pulpy fun, I hope Godzilla vs. Kong finally, finally gives us goofy Godzilla. Also, I really hope he recruits some friends so we can get goofy Godzilla Gang too. Bring back the kaiju volleyball dammit!

Godzilla and Ghidorah were fucking insane. I really love how they built on Godzilla's lore from the first movie. But sadly, they wasted Rodan and short changed Mothra. I'm pissed they erased so much of her canon. We deserve more Mothra because this movie was not enough. Her mythology is really special, so I hope they don't just abandon it with what they set up here. They even retconned her giant egg! Wtf!

I'm a little bitter because I saw this in IMAX but the footage was all standard ratio. Still, the giant screen and incredible audio made for an unforgettable experience.

It has to be said, everything with the humans was absolutely awful. Not like B-Movie cutesy cringe, just straight-up leave-the-theater bad. And they kept cutting back to the humans in-between all the awesome stuff! Gahhhh. I can't believe the humans were even worse in this than in the first one. These American Godzilla movies really need to stop forcing us to invest in their human characters, especially when they're are all dumbasses. The modern series needs to embrace the inherent goofiness instead of meekly trying to legitimize it with an abuse of shitty watered down human dramas. Why don't these studio people understand that when Godzilla and Ghidorah and Rodan and Mothra are in the middle of war, no one cares about the humans.

But all gripes aside, this movie is a true blessing. It is big and it is loud and it is jam-packed with spectacular action. If this series can overcome the urge to be serious, and embrace the liberty of breaking the limits of imagination, then it will be able to become something truly transcendent.

Long live the king.


Godzilla Gang #10

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