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  • The Mummy

    The Mummy

    What a dire, pointless slog of a movie. You can't see anything, the plot makes no sense, and I don't even get the joy of seeing how they're failing to build a franchise until the very end where Russell Crowe and the archeologist who looks like a model do some narration about how maybe they need a monster to stop monsters, or something. It's just so lazy - the secret organization or whatever just fighting Evil, no attempt to give…

  • Ben-Hur

    Ben-Hur

    ½

    This movie sucks.

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  • Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    ★★½

    The campiest superhero movie since Batman and Robin, probably, made all more so because of how serious it takes itself. The problem with "taking superheroes seriously," thinking about the collateral damage and the philosophical questions of them, is that superheroes are inherently extremely silly and unreal. The question of "how should we react to superheroes" is one that has no bearing on the real world, where superheroes don't exist, and so trying to philosophize on it just feels pointless unless…

  • Suicide Squad

    Suicide Squad

    It's incredible how the DCEU, for the most part, is based around the idea that Superman is bad. You take the most iconic part of the source material and deal only with the most paranoid, bad-faith reactions to it, without ever showing what made it work in the first place. It wants to deconstruct the ideas behind Superman/superheroes without constructing them first. Worldbuilding needs work, and they just don't bother to put it in.

    In general, that's how I feel…