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  • Dunkirk

    Dunkirk

    ★★★★★

    "He's coming back round... HE'S COMING BACK ROUND!!"

    One of the most intense theater experiences I've ever had. Nolan has once again masterfully crafted an amazing film, this time centered on a particularly miraculous event in World War II. I loved this movie when I saw the IMAX premiere last week, but only now on my second viewing have decided to bump it up to a five star rating. And I'll explain why here, as well as why you have…

  • The Room

    The Room

    ½

    A collection of some of the most well-written and acted lines in cinematic history.

    "I DID NOT HIT HER THAT IS BULLSHIT I DID NOT HIT HER I DID NOOOOT oh hi mark"

    "YOU ARE TEARING ME APART LISA"

    "WHY LISA WHY WHY WHY WHY"

    "We'll see about that"
    *30 seconds later* "We'll see about that"

    And let's not forget the 5 or so gratuitous 10 minute long sex scenes that did leaps and bounds to further the plot and the development of its characters.

    Also where did these guys learn how to toss a football?

    I cannot wait for The Disaster Artist.

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  • Wonder Woman

    Wonder Woman

    ★★½

    "Now I will just have to DESTROY YOU!!!!!"

    Jesus H. Christ.  Why, DC? Just... why.

    I have no idea where all this extremely positive reception is coming from.  This movie was bad.  Like, barely better than Suicide Squad bad.  People have been saying that this movie has broken the DC film losing streak, but I strongly disagree.

    The pacing was extremely slow.  Much too slow.  The CGI was passable at best, but usually pretty awful, which is simply inexcusable, especially…

  • Alien: Covenant

    Alien: Covenant

    ★★★★

    "Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair."

    This was a very good science fiction film.  It suffered from the same slow pacing in the first act as did the original Alien, but quickly picked up during the second act and culminated well in the final act.  I can say with complete certainty that you need to have seen Prometheus to fully enjoy this movie.  Which is to be expected, as Ridley Scott has already said many times that Covenant