Yo_Roboto

All I wanted was a sweet distraction, for an hour or two...

Favorite films

  • Hard Boiled
  • The Good, the Bad and the Ugly
  • Seven Samurai
  • Collateral

Recent activity

All
  • Top Gun: Maverick

    ★★★★★

  • Old

    ★★★

  • RRR

    ★★★★½

  • Fortress 2

    ★★½

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  • Infinite

    Infinite

    ★★★★

    Uh oh... I glanced at some reviews and the LB average for this one... Looks like I've got my work cut out for me.

    *Rolls up sleeves*

    [Mark Walhburg voice]

    Okay look you dumb bitches and bastards. All you goddamned theater kids wouldn't shut up about what a great bad movie Cats is, now it's time for us Action Assholes to reclaim the bad movie throne. You dumbshits get one terrible movie and I gotta listen to 700 podcasts about…

  • Across 110th Street

    Across 110th Street

    ★★★★

    It’s the texture of this movie that pulls you in.

    The grit and grime and haze; the grainy film stock, the sweaty scenes shot with an anxious, claustrophobic camera. The sound of hands flipping through stacks of cash. The violence, the blood, the rust on the getaway car.

    And even though the blood is that bright orange movie blood, the scene is set, the world is built. It feels alive and dangerous. The portrait of a city on edge.

    But…

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  • Top Gun: Maverick

    Top Gun: Maverick

    ★★★★★

    My only complaint walking out of Top Gun: Maverick is that it left me unsure where I should enlist first: The Navy or scientology?

    If this is what's possible with a Defense Department budget and the sheer force of individual will, this might be my “I love big brother” moment with Tom Cruise, his cult, and the military industrial complex... because this is overpowering entertainment.  

    First and foremost, it’s a thrill ride. You can feel the g-forces from the aerial…

  • RRR

    RRR

    ★★★★½

    Quentin Tarantino once described Hong Kong cinema as less bound by genre lines than Hollywood movies, saying that Hong Kong audiences wanted a little bit of everything from their night at the movies; action, comedy, romance, drama, all back to back to back to back.

    If that’s how to think of Hong Kong in broad strokes, then what to make of India?

    Indian cinema is like Hong Kong on uppers. It’s pure joyous madness. It’s like a way of making…

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  • Half Past Dead

    Half Past Dead

    The Rock and The Matrix tossed into a very 2002 blender, made by executives who almost certainly used the word “urban” too many times during pitch meetings.

    You’ve got: Ja Rule threatened by a rocket launcher pointed at his nuts... Morris Chestnut sexually harassing a Supreme Court Justice strapped to an electric chair....A Cirque du Soleil gun fight from dangling chains... And a medically inadvisable quantity of rap rock...

    But none of this is as deeply annoying, unsettling, and completely entertaining as watching Steven Seagal code switch during his scenes with Ja Rule.

  • Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers

    Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers

    ★★

    Leave it to Disney to make a kids movie where the villain is an IP pirate. Lol.

    I've never really understood the "cartoon characters in the real world" thing. It's just not a concept that ever clicked with me. Here it leads to some minorly cute jokes about mixing CG and "hand drawn" animation together into one universe... Jokes that probably would've worked if the "hand-drawn" animation was actually, you know... hand-drawn. Instead, it's that fake-flat 3D animation that just…