Favorite films

  • 8½
  • Weekend
  • F for Fake
  • Blow-Up

Recent activity

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  • PAW Patrol: The Movie

  • Till Death

    ★★½

  • Mass

    ★★½

  • Snake Eyes: G.I. Joe Origins

    ★½

Recent reviews

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  • PAW Patrol: The Movie

    PAW Patrol: The Movie

    I watched this because I thought if I genuinely liked this, maybe I could get Lights Camera Jackson to unblock me on Twitter.

    I don’t need to rate it. I mostly looked at my phone the whole time. All canines are bastards.

  • Till Death

    Till Death

    ★★½

    These dudes REALLY hate this woman, huh

Popular reviews

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  • Q: Into the Storm

    Q: Into the Storm

    ★★★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    hahaha holy shit the son of a bitch actually figured out who Q was AND managed to get someone out of an authoritarian country on the last flight before COVID lockdown seconds before they were indicted for a phony crime that would have certainly led to their death

    cullen hoback we have no choice but to stan

  • Battle of the Sexes

    Battle of the Sexes

    ★★★★

    Picture an alternate reality where I'm a studio executive and Faris/Dayton pitch me this movie.

    Them: Emma Stone is, like, hella gay.

    Me: Here's 100 million dollars.

    Them: We're not finished. It's shot in 16 mm, there's cotton candy colored neon lighting in like four scenes, all the bras are pointy, her beard husband is literally dressed like Fred from Scooby-Doo in one scene, and Alan Cumming plays her queer spirit guide.

    Me: 200 MILLION DOLLARS