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  • Jane Eyre

    Jane Eyre

    Regardless of the fact that Brontë's novel is obviously way too long to fit everything in a two hour movie, this is an exceptionally compressed version of the story. William Hurt is sadly miscast as Rochester, murmuring his way through the film. Charlotte Gainsbourg gives a decent performance but fails to deliver Jane's emotional nature. Blanche Ingram.. Well, I never thought I'd read "Elle MacPherson" and "period drama" in the same sentence. Skip this Zeffirelli's version and watch the 1983 BBC version (mini-series) — that one is incredibly true to the spirit of the novel, and Timothy Dalton is absolutely fantastic as the tormented male hero.

  • The Pagan King

    The Pagan King

    Let's turn this into a drinking game.

    Drink every time:
    – there's a famous Latvian actor wearing a ridiculous hairpiece
    – Ivo Martinsons goes crazy
    – Ivo Martinsons goes crazy with the big wooden zīle
    – the dog appears

    Drink 2x when:
    – moustache of the wrong century fills the screen
    – someone gets stabbed

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  • The Snowman

    The Snowman

    ★½

    Remember that girl who ordered a nice looking dress from eBay, but received some second-hand papier-mache looking garbage instead? This is how I felt, hoping for the noirish elegance and roughness of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and then witnessing this astonishingly poor product of a film.

  • Happy End

    Happy End

    ★★★★

    The final shot of Happy End must be the most tragicomically accurate reflection of our cynical age I've seen in years.

    Also, Isabelle Huppert was standing just a few feet away from me. I'm so happy right now I could cry.