Favorite films

Pinned reviews

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  Vampires 1998

  ★★★½ Watched 26 Nov 2015 13

  THIS MOVIE SUCKS! DEPT.

  For generations, vampires have terrified and captivated audiences all over the world with their amoral appetites and seductive malignancy. If you're looking for more of that, though, you better go watch Dracula again, because this is ...

  JOHN CRAP'N'SLUR'S SHAMPIRES

  "I'm Jack Slow, f&!@king vampire hunter! I was hired by the Catholic Church to hunt and kill vampires, so it's only fitting that I swear like a f*&!king priest! Plus, it's cheaper than hiring screenwriters!"

  "I'm…

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  She-Devils on Wheels 1968

  ★★★ Watched 14 Jun 2014 3

  There once was a gang called the Man-Eaters /
  They rode on one- and two-seaters /
  It's easy to tell, they liked to raise hell /
  and in cutting off heads they're the leaders

Recent reviews

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  Jawan 2023

  ★★★★½ Watched 24 Sep 2023

  Really wakes you up to the power of cinema in a bunch of different ways, most notably by singlehandedly justifying the existence of 2009's The Taking of Pelham 123.

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  The Bitch 1984

  ★★★★ Watched 23 Sep 2023

  I was expecting something with a lot of artistic remove from its genre with this but in fact it's the exact opposite, pure hardboiled noir of an unadulterated variety that rarely makes it to the screen, even the French screen. As such I enjoyed it immensely even though I would probably like it even more as a book, preferably with a cover that would make me embarrassed to be seen reading it in public.

Popular reviews

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  Punch-Drunk Love 2002

  ★★★★★ Rewatched 26 Aug 2013 170

  When I was 17 or 18 I was eating lunch at this place called New York Subs (now closed) and I ordered my sandwich and sat down in front of this man (who I later learned was my parents' dentist, incidentally) who was by himself waiting on his food. When the waitress came by to bring him his order, I heard her ask him about the crossword puzzle he was doing. "Yeah, I find it's a lot easier to do…

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  Creed 2015

  ★★★★½ Watched 05 Dec 2015 15

  The truest scene in this movie is when Adonis is sitting on the stoop outside the gym and a kid on a motorbike comes up to him and goes "I heard you were Apollo Creed's son" and Adonis is like "yeah," and the kid goes "that's what's up" and does a wheelie.