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  • She-Devils on Wheels

    She-Devils on Wheels

    ★★★

    There once was a gang called the Man-Eaters /
    They rode on one- and two-seaters /
    It's easy to tell, they liked to raise hell /
    and in cutting off heads they're the leaders

  • Fast and Furry-ous

    Fast and Furry-ous

    ★★★★★

    Whos that.

    Thats the Road Runner, fastest bird in the world they say. I figure hes at least the fastest in these parts. Hes got a speed so quick you cant really take its measure.

    Whos that mangy feller chasin after him.

    Thats The Coyote. Some people think hes tryin to eat the bird, but Ive always believed hes just chasin him on account of hes runnin. The Runner'll always run, so The Coyote'll always be chasin him.

    Thats a nice thought.

    I dont know if its nice, but its a thought.

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  • Attack of the Crab Monsters

    Attack of the Crab Monsters

    ★★★★

    "Once they were men. Now they are land crabs."

    In look and tone this has to have been one of the primary inspirations for Joe Dante's Mant, but unlike that film this has a surprising lot of flavorful complications thrown into its central premise, especially given that it's just barely over an hour long. These Crab Monsters aren't simply atomically mutated giant crabs, but molecularly unstable brain-eaters that can absorb humans' minds and then communicate with other humans by transmitting…

  • Hollywood Boulevard

    Hollywood Boulevard

    ★★★

    Not very good, but then again that's the point. Happy birthday, RC.

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  • Punch-Drunk Love

    Punch-Drunk Love

    ★★★★★

    When I was 17 or 18 I was eating lunch at this place called New York Subs (now closed) and I ordered my sandwich and sat down in front of this man (who I later learned was my parents' dentist, incidentally) who was by himself waiting on his food. When the waitress came by to bring him his order, I heard her ask him about the crossword puzzle he was doing. "Yeah, I find it's a lot easier to do…

  • Creed

    Creed

    ★★★★½

    The truest scene in this movie is when Adonis is sitting on the stoop outside the gym and a kid on a motorbike comes up to him and goes "I heard you were Apollo Creed's son" and Adonis is like "yeah," and the kid goes "that's what's up" and does a wheelie.